Working with Protectors

Have you ever felt like something inside won't let you go deeper?

A protector steps in—a wall goes up. Often, you can end up feeling "stuck."

Protectors don't block us because they're difficult. They block us because they care.

In this class, we'll explore how to build relationship with protectors so that access becomes possible — not through force, but through trust.

You'll learn:

•How to approach protectors
•What makes protectors feel safe enough to soften
•How to work with polarization
•Why negotiation changes everything

This class is for anyone with IFS experience, from therapists, coaches, and committed IFS practitioners to clients and everyday IFS lovers who want to work more skillfully with parts that guard vulnerability.

Protectors are not the enemy. They are loyal, and can become allies once we honor their needs and values.

The question is not how to get past them.
The question is how to work with them.

An intimate, live 2-hour experiential workshop for only five people on Zoom!

IFS Live Online Class

Click here to schedule a free chat to see if this group is for you.

In the group, we will:

– Introduce ourselves to each other!
– Go inside to connect with our parts for three minutes in silence
– Share what feels comfortable
– Have a discussion about the specific IFS topic in this class
– Have Melissa answer questions, based on her 2,350 hours of IFS training and 23 years of experience
– Brief discussion of themes and issues that arose
– 20 minute IFS demonstration of the topic of the class
– Heartfelt sharing after the demo: how you resonated or were inspired by the session
– Time for personal practice BY YOURSELF on YOURSELF for 10-15 minutes usually
– Sharing about your practice experience, whatever feels comfortable
– Close out our time with a word or phrase we are taking away from the experience.
– People who want to learn about upcoming classes / sign up for upcoming classes can stay for a few minutes after the class ends, but there is no obligation to stay, it's just a convenient time if you want it.

This class is the best fit for:

– Open-hearted people who have a basic ability to work with their parts
– People who want to learn how to work more deeply with their parts
– IFS lovers who want to learn how to do IFS on themselves, and want support
– IFS coaches and therapists who are seeking guidance in a very low-key, friendly setting with a master IFS practitioner

If you are looking for a place to:

– hone your IFS skills
– with emotionally mature, IFS-savvy folks
– in a safe container
– of mutual support and encouragement

I invite you to consider this group!

If you want to learn more, sign up for a free Zoom call with me, or watch one of my YouTube interviews to get a better sense of me as a person!

Schedule a Free Chat

Our Group Structure

Introductions

Going inside / Journaling

We will begin as all IFS gatherings do, by going inside to connect to ourselves and center. Feel free to journal.

Sharing

A spacious check-in

Teaching and Q & A about the class topic

20 minute IFS Session Demonstration

Heartfelt feedback after the demo

Time to practice with your own parts

Sharing

Time to share any insights you want to share

Closing

After that, we'll close with a word or phrase we're taking with us.

Details

Does any of this sound familiar?

"I enjoy parts work with my practitioner / coach / therapist, but then I don't tend to check in with them between sessions."

"I want to be able to connect more deeply with my parts but my protectors won't let me."

"I just don't feel like journaling."

"I want to learn from someone who has experience working directly with their parts on their own. I don't want to just read about the IFS steps from a book."

"I'd like to connect with other like-minded people who also see IFS as a way of life, not merely something theoretical they're learning to use with clients."

If you resonate with any of these statements, then this drop-in group is ideal for you!

Imagine having a 23-year expert in IFS support you in developing your OWN relationship to your parts.

You'll learn how to:

• Get questions answered right when they arise, before they begin blocking your work
• Bring compassion to your DIY IFS process
• Provide Self-energy to enhance yours, to create more access to deeper parts
• Help you make IFS a way of life, not just something you do one hour a week with a practitioner
• Build a supportive community: Connect with other IFS folks and also to other IFS resources

About Melissa

Learn from a 23-year IFS Expert. Melissa Sandfort has been an IFS Certified Practitioner since 2010, with over 2,350 hours of IFS training, 1,000+ hours of in-person training with Richard Schwartz, and over 8,000 hours of her own personal IFS work.

Read Melissa's Full Bio

FAQ & Class Agreements

What is the refund policy?

There are no refunds. If you must miss a class, you can transfer your registration to a future class!

I have done everything I can to provide an affordable class full of value. I put my heart into all my classes. It actually breaks my heart when people want a refund, and I can't put so much love and care into my classes and then be heartbroken when people ask for refunds. Therefore, I have a no-refund policy for all my classes!

This keeps my heart and my parts safe, so that I can be vulnerable and excited about offering what I offer.

If a refund policy is important to you, I am the wrong teacher for you! I give everything I can, and in return I ask that you honor me by thinking before buying a course so that it is the right match for you.

Thanks for understanding!

Class Safety Agreement

Clarity about our purpose:

To deepen our capacity to do IFS and to develop our Self-leadership as human beings.

Privacy and Confidentiality:

These classes require a private, confidential space. A private room in your home or office. Or a private conference room in a library or your car parked in a quiet space. This is for the safety of all participants, as we can not open and focus inside if we are distracted by external environments.

If you join the Zoom from a public place, like a cafe, store or park, you will be asked to leave the group.

Zoom Video On:

Being able to see everyone in the group enhances safety, so plan to have your video on during most of the class, which is not recorded. Turning video off during personal practice time is fine.

Choice:

You are free to censor what you disclose. No is a complete sentence. Choose to share ONLY what you feel comfortable with.

Confidentiality:

All material everyone shares should not be shared with people who are not members of this group, even if you don't use their name. You'd be surprised how far stories can travel.

Speak up for Safety:

If you are having difficulty with something that's triggered you, PLEASE speak for your parts, either directly in the group or as soon as you can afterwards. Please LISTEN to your parts when they tell you what they need in order to feel safe. Safety is our number one value. When you speak for your safety needs, you speak for the safety needs of the whole group.

Speaking for parts, not from parts:

To the extent that you can, speaking for parts, not from them, will help us maintain safety when sharing in the group.

Embodying parts:

During coaching demos, in distinction to other times during the group, feel free to speak FROM parts and to experiment with embodying them. The difference between blending and embodying is: when you are blended, you are in a part and you don't know you are in a part. When you embody a part, you are in a part and YOU and the part BOTH know you are 'being' the part.

No Coercion:

"Thank you, for letting me, be myself!" In this group, there is "no crosstalk." This means when one person shares, no one judges, gives advice, or reacts against what they shared.

Feedback:

Share how you are inspired or how you resonate with others. DO NOT share judgement, advice, or criticism. If you criticize others in the class, I reserve the right to determine that you may not be the right fit for my classes. Thank you for understanding.

Timeliness:

We commit to start and end on time. We start on time; this increases safety and strengthens the container.

Support and responsibility:

Ultimately, the only person who can keep you fully safe in a group is you. I want to do everything I can to make this group a safe space to learn, to go inside, and to share, in whatever ways feel right for you — but you are responsible for listening to the sometimes difficult-to-hear voices who tell you what they REALLY need to be safe.

You are not crazy if you get triggered, it's ULTRA NORMAL in IFS work. So take care of yourself, and possibly give yourself extra support on days when you do IFS!

Thank you for your commitment to this safety agreement!

Working With Protectors